Looking back on my work from early in the semester I can confidently say that my revision process, things big and small, has undergone a huge transformation. I went back and re read my 600-word, 1000-word, and final drafts for project 1 part 1 for this class. While reading I was puzzled over the fact that my paragraphs barely changed a word throughout all the drafts. Besides adding new paragraphs to hit word count there were no signs of thought or care for the revision of my essay. As a specific example, my introduction paragraph stayed the exact same throughout all the drafts. Not a single word was changed. Looking back on this, this shows that I clearly did not care about the development of my essay and was strictly trying to hit word count. As I continued to read my old work from this class, I could see a little bit of progression starting at the final draft of project 1 part 2. In my 1000-word draft of this project my first body paragraph started out like this, “In Kelly’s Technophilia article he starts off his argument…” (Barry 1). As soon as I read this, I was hoping that when I read the final draft that there would be some improvement. Thankfully, there was. In my final draft of project 1 part 2 my first body paragraph got changed to this, “When we are far away from loved ones it can be really challenging for us. With the invention of technology and more specifically the smart phone, we have been able to avoid hardships regarding distance with loved ones. Kelley’s Technophilia article is about the love for technology, it is in the name. Technophilia, being defined as the love for technology” (Barry 1). There is a clear development shown from the before and after of this sentence. There is a topic sentence that clearly explains what the paragraph will be about, and the author is introduced into the paragraph through conversation rather than simply stating his opinions. This example happens to show local revision throughout my work, but I also believe that I have improved on global revision which I believe is evident in my chosen work sample. In this chosen work sample my 800-word draft goes stray from the objective at some points. My objective in this paper was to write about the impacts of technology and what my opinions were as well as incorporating both Sherry Turkle and Jonathan Haidt’s ideas into conversation. An example of me getting off topic is when I introduce my second body paragraph like this, “Being a part of younger generations today is a struggle on its own” (Barry 2). I go on to discuss the poor mental health of the younger generation more than what’s necessary for this specific assignment. I was able to recognize that I was straying from my point and revised this topic sentence in my final draft to, “The use of social media and smartphones puts strain on young kids causing them to suffer mentally” (Barry 2). I tied back in the conversation of social media while also incorporating the idea that kids are suffering mentally. I believe that my improved revision has made for massive development in my writing. Sentences feel more thoughtful, words feel purposeful, and overall structure feels cared for.